I've watched you my whole life, a gaze of curiosity with silent acceptance. Your cruel words and twisted ways keep me open to the truths of life. There's so much desire brewing inside of me, I want to tell you things but the time is never right, the world won't let me yet. I felt you inside of me today, digging through my skull, burrowing deep into my cerebellum. It made me pause, stretch my head to the stars, and take a deep breath. I hold my tongue for the sake of your virtues, as few as they might be. One day i'll be left with fumes of hope--this is not a renewable resource.

I am worried that the right time will be the wrong place, I am worried there will be no one left for me to beg for forgiveness. I am afraid that both of me will one day agree on a solution, and i'll follow through.

A bad place.

It'll pass, all I need is a bit more sedation.